Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Ruminating on Relocating . . .

Just a few months into my year-long prep for the Big Move, I'm starting to come to grips with what it will mean to relocate my life 2000 miles. I know this is just the early stages of this; in a few more months, the low-level panic I'm feeling buzzing just under the surface of my skin will blossom to full-on crisis, and you will need to pry my fingernails from the ceiling. But, for now, my thoughts about the coming move are focused on just a few areas:

1. The city is utterly and completely foreign; I have never even visited, and probably will not be able to afford to before next January.

2. I have never lived alone, and relied entirely on myself for my own financial responsibility. Yes, it is past time, but still pretty scary.

3. If I get lonely, there will be no one I even remotely know nearby to visit with. They will all be available via phone, but sometimes there is no substitute for a hug when you're feeling blue.

4. If I get into trouble (ie: lose my job and cannot pay rent or food, car breaks down and I cannot afford to fix it, get very sick), there is no one who can bail me out. I am completely on my own, and could end up homeless.

I know that at my age, most women have already experienced most of these things, survived them, and moved on. I have not, and the thought of forcing myself into utter and total independence is already starting to keep me up nights. What if I realize that whatever shitty admin job I can get doesn't actually pay enough for me to live on? What if all opportunities in film costuming or acting fall through, and I'm in a strange city to no purpose? What if I hate LA?

At the same time, I know that this move is coming at an important time for me, and that I made the decision to do this because I knew it was the right thing to do. I am ready to leave here and start something new, ready, for lack of a better term, to begin my life. I know I should be independent, that I have always craved to be so, and that living on my own is the best choice for me right now.

Still, this thing is scaring the crap out of me, still 8 months away. Money worries are pretty much constant for me right now, and I could use any encouragement anyone has for me.

Anybody have any words of wisdom/encouragement to keep me going on the path I'm on?


Anonymous said...

Are you on Facebook at all? The best way to get started in a new town is to have a network. I moved here from Ohio about 11 years ago or so, and I depended a lot on a handful of people I knew to point me in the right directions. The reason I mention Facebook is because I know a lot of working professionals in LA who are on my Friends List who would be more than happy to help you get started. Some are theatre professionals from my alma mater and some are folks we probably both know from Bristol. I know Tab and Ansel are on FB, so it wouldn't take much for you to join and get connected to all the right people. You don't have to jump into this all alone. :)

Ginger said...

I'm pretty sure we're already friends on Facebook, Julie;) I've actually been on Facebook longer than Tabitha has; I forced her to join after I did!

Anonymous said...

I'm with the other commenter here on the networking thing. I'm part of a large volunteer organization and whenever I move somewhere new, I get involved locally and it's an instant network for me. I meet people who show me the ropes of the city and give me tips on where the best shopping is or what there is to do.

Facebook is great for networking. Another thing you could try is looking for groups or organizations that share some of your interests or lifestyle choices (maybe a sewing/crafting group or something) and connect with them before you move. I have a friend who eats vegan and who moved to a city not known for having resources for vegans. Before she moved there, she joined an online vegan group or listserv. Through that she found a roomate, cheap apartment, social scene and everything, so getting involved with something you enjoy and feel comfortable with can be really useful.

I think it's awesome that you're making the move.

Ginger said...

Good ideas! Thanks!

christa elyce said...

wow! sounds like you have an adventure infront of you. you can probably do some great research on your new residence before you get there. find the cool things to do. find some clubs or meetings that suit you so that you can find people that share the same interests as you.

i'm a military brat ( a child of a military soldier) i'm use to moving. those are just a few suggestions of what you can do.

as for your worries on money...pray. when my husband left me a year and a half ago and friend of mine, a finacial guru, made a plan for me. she made it easy for me to see what i need to spend money on and what not. like junk food...things that give my body nutrients is a waste of money...she showed me free ways of entertainment for me and the kids... so I know it can be done.

padawansguide said...

There are tons of costumers in SoCal - I have one LJ friend moving back out there this spring. I'd be more than happy to put you in touch with some of them, so they'll let you know about costume events.

I think it'll be a good experience for you to try being on your own, and I'm sure your family wouldn't let you be homeless!

Best wishes!